Pengor: Penguin of Doom

Greetings puny humans. You are reading the day-to-day account of one super-intelligent penguin's attempts to take over the world and free the oppressed penguin masses. Penguin Liberation or death! Send more money and fish.

Penguin Liberation:
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Monday, November 24, 2003


Another story debunked

Penguins do not fall over.

The only time I've ever fallen over in public is after twelve pints of extra-strong cider, and that was because some bastard tripped me up outside the Rajpoot Curry House for a laugh. I was nowhere near drunk, and all the voms were as a result of the concussion caused by this violent assualt on my person.

Delirious, I told everybody that "You're my best mate...BLEEEEEEURGH!", but that's the kind of thing you expect from a head injury. I can take my drink, unlike you puny humans, who'd roll around drunk just by taking the lid off a bottle of turps.

Skint, Again

Bloody Hell's teeth. The things a penguin's got to do for money. Laugh while you can, puny humans, for tomorrow you die! Painfully, on the end of a sharpened pecky beak.

posted by Pengor at Monday, November 24, 2003
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