Pengor: Penguin of Doom

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Monday, August 25, 2003


"The Penguin Who Loved Me"

Well, well, well, now that was a turn-up for the books. It turned out that Gloria Fishfinger (who I am not having a relationship with), is not really Gloria Fishfinger (who I am still not having a relationship with), but a SPY!

It turns out that she is really secret agent Fishy Galore, double-o haddock, licensed to slap preople around the face with a wet fish, sent by MI6 to break up the penguin revolution. Fat chance, just one look at my handsome features, and the poor girl was smitten, deeeply in love with me and quite unable to fulfill her mission of slapping me round the face with a wet fish, and dragging me off to a zoo somewhere. But no, I saw right through her disguise, and despite not having a relationship with her AT ALL, I blew her cover and the penguin revolution is back on track.

This is how it happened:

Gloria: "Oh Pengor! Show me that trick with your beak again, you so dreamy!"
Me: "Ah ha! You not really a sweet, innocent penguin, you a spy! I see your silenced pistol disguised as a herring."
Gloria: "Yarks! Rumbled! But let that not spoil our beautiful friendship. I love you Pengie!"
Me: "Stop your slobbering, wumman - who are you really?"
Gloria: (wrestles self to floor in a manner which to the casual onlooker may be described as somewhat sexy, but is natural penguin behaviour) "My name is Fishy Galore"
Me: "I must be dreaming."

I'm letting her hang around an' stuff, doin' the washing up round PLA(O) HQ and generally lookin' glamourous hanging off my wing. Gives the place a touch of class. But I AM NOT having a relationship with her.

Nice tail feathers, mind.

posted by Pengor at Monday, August 25, 2003
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